A Free Tank of Gas

Today I could have had a free tank of gas.

I was in a bad mood because my daughter had an object d’art that she made and wanted it delivered over forty miles from home. She asked me to drive it there because she knows I’m a writer and keep my own schedule, which means I have no schedule. It is now 9:30 p.m. and I just now decided to write this piece. It’s kind of nice to be my own boss and work when I please.

But this morning the Ryder Cup had started and I wanted to watch the golf matches. I didn’t want to drive 45 miles to drop off a fancy painted ginger jar my daughter made, but there I was, and saw that I needed gas before hitting the road.

I pulled up to the pump and swiped my card, but for some reason, the pump already said, “Lift nozzle and select grade.” Someone else had pulled up to the pump, tried to pay, and then pulled away for whatever reason in spite of the pump being activated and ready to fill my car with gas. I tried hanging up the pump to cancel the sale, but the pump remained active, as if Satan himself was tempting me to help myself to free gas. The pump was primed and ready to give me a free tank of gas. All I had to do was remove the nozzle, stick it into the gas tank, and pull the lever.

It wouldn’t be like I was actually stealing from someone, would it?

Yeah, it was exactly like I would be stealing because I would have been stealing. Someone else had tried to pay for gas and then went to another pump without realizing they had left the previous pump active. The gas I would have pumped would have been charged to someone else’s credit card. It wasn’t much of a moral dilemma, to be perfectly honest. I hung up the nozzle and pressed the “Cancel sale” button enough until it finally took, paid for my own gas, and filled my tank. To be honest, the only part that annoyed me and caused me brief consternation was my initial struggle to cancel the free gasoline temptation. I didn’t spend a whole lot of time wrestling with my conscience about the right thing to do. I knew I would be stealing from someone else if I pumped that gas just as clearly as if I’d stolen a wallet. I could never have been convicted of a crime in a million years, but that didn’t make any difference. I knew it would be wrong because the moral compass inside my brain told me I’d be stealing.

The technical term for the crime is theft by conversion. It would have been a petty crime, and committed by a petty person. This experience reminded me of an article written years ago by atheist/biology professor Jerry Coyne that made the audacious claim in an editorial written for USA Today titled “You Can Be Good Without God.” In the article Coyne bragged about helping a Federal Express driver who had dropped some packages in the road as if that small act of altruism had made him a good person or something. News flash–it didn’t.

In fact, I have private knowledge that Jerry Coyne is a very bad person. Once upon a time, I wrote another blog article about a lecture Coyne gave at Appalachian State University and within 24 hours, I received a very nasty computer virus that cost money to remove. I might chalk it up to a coincidence except a professor from Appalachian State read the article and commented, then 24 hours later wrote back begging me to take down his comment because he’d gotten the same computer virus during finals and had to buy a new computer to complete grading final exams.

Now, can I prove Coyne sent the virus (or had one of his minions send it) to both of us less than 24 hours after my article was published? No, of course not. Even so, I have little doubt he was behind it somehow. I’m not a big believer in coincidence. If only I had gotten a virus, or the professor, that could have been a coincidence. Both of us on the same day, not so much. So, don’t be fooled into thinking Jerry Coyne is some kind of a great guy because he helped a FedEx driver pick up a few packages.

By the same token, was my small act of honesty in forgoing free gas something to brag about? Did it earn me eternal salvation? Not even close. Performing a good deed does not make one a good person, even if that person thinks of himself as a Christian. Romans 3:10 reminds us, There is none righteous, no, not one. Jerry Coyne is not a good person, and neither am I. I have no reason to brag. Even Mother Teresa needed the sacrifice of Christ on the cross to gain her salvation. Like me, she only needed to confess with her mouth and believe in her heart to enter Heaven when she died. Doing a good deed, or even a lifetime of good deeds, simply isn’t good enough.

Heaven exists, but I’m never going to earn my way there by my own merit. It will only be by the grace of God one day soon enough that I will finally get to meet Yahweh, Jesus, and Charlie Kirk in person. I didn’t steal a tank of gas today. I didn’t sleep with my neighbor’s wife. I also didn’t rob a bank or murder anybody. I ran an errand, watched some golf, and took a nap instead. Big deal. Avoiding sin doesn’t make me a good person. Nothing I can do will ever make me a good person.

However, the blood of Christ has redeemed me. Thank you, God!